The male dildo

Sexual equality has been the domain of women for a number of years and this is particularly evident in the variety of dildos, vibrators and other sex toys available to them. Thanks to some creative types at Interactive Life Forms Inc. some balance has been established in the self-love sexual arena.

For decades, men have had to make do with their left or right hand, or transform regular household objects into temporary vaginas; I mean who hasn't lubricated a vacuum cleaner hose in the name of personal gratification? Now masturbating men can leave the Dyson under the stairs thanks to a male sex toy named the Fleshlight.

Shaped like a Maglite flashlight, hence the name, the Fleshlight offers five varieties of orifice, including the vagina, mouth and butt, plus a discreet non-descriptive orifice and a version called "Alien" that is believed to be a collector's item. Immediately the men are realising that numbing their left hand with ice and then plunging among the pubic hair is no match for the options this sex toy offers.

The fun does not stop at orifices because like any man-orientated gadget it has to have plenty of accessories. How can you not be tempted by new sensations such as Super Ribbed, Speed Bump, Super Tight, Ultra Tight and Wonder Wave? Each orifice has different internal textures and tightness, but the Wonder Wave is ribbed inside and the Ultra Tight has a canal circumference of 0.7 cm (1/4").

Guys, don't reach for your credit card just yet because the premature ejaculators may like to know about the Stamina Training Unit, which helps "train" the user to know how to control ejaculation. The Fleshlight is available in a range of colours - like you care - and it can easily be washed with warm water - do not use soap!

Please remember that this a fArt article, not an iKritic, and my research is based upon the Fleshlight's Wikipedia entry and the official website, although I am always willing to try out new means of self-satisfaction if somebody wants to send me a new one - just send it in plain packaging, don't tell my wife and throw in some KY.